Mum discovers husband’s sick double life
A MUM-of-two has revealed how her life was turned upside down when she discovered her husband of more than 25 years was a paedophile.
Olivia, who doesn't want to disclose her real name, first learned her husband was leading a double life when cops raided their home to confront him about his "guilty secret", The Sun reported.
She told today how she never had any suspicion the father of her two daughters was viewing "extremely disturbing" sex abuse images of kids online - until police stormed their house.
Recalling that day three years ago, she told the Sun Online: "It was quite early in the morning and I was upstairs getting dressed and putting on my make-up.
"I said to my husband 'what's going on?' and he said they are here to arrest me for viewing indecent images of children.
"He was very upfront and matter of fact in the way he spoke and he seemed quite calm about it.
"The police started filling in the background and he kept saying: 'I'm not a paedophile'.
"He knew he was guilty - whether he thought he would be able to get away with it or get out of it, I don't know."
Olivia maintains she had no idea what her husband had been doing on his computer, but she did notice a change in his behaviour in the months leading up to the arrest.
She said: "He had been depressed for a number of years on and off, but it was getting worse.
"He started getting up in the night because he couldn't asleep, often falling asleep on the settee and sometimes with the computer still on.
"I called his boss because I was worried about his mental health. My husband had said he was getting a lot of criticism at work and I felt it was fuelling his depression."
Olivia says she once confronted him about his excessive internet use - but still had no idea he was viewing illegal images.
She said: "I knew he was someone that was quite curious, and about six months or a year before the arrest, I actually said to him: 'I hope that when you're looking on the internet you're being careful'.
He looked me in the eye and said he wouldn't do anything and I believed him. But I was his wife and I'd lived with him for more than 20 years so why wouldn't I?
"My mind had not suspected in any way that he was looking at abusive images of children."
In the days after his arrest, Olivia was forced to decide whether she would stand by her husband and how she would tell their two daughters.
She eventually decided to divorce him but says today she "doesn't hate him" - and has even allowed him to rebuild his relationship with their girls.
She said: "He is completely remorseful and admitted what he'd done.
"He has been rebuilding his relationship with his children. They have coped quite courageously and the hard thing is he was a good father to them.
"One of them was more willing to get back in touch. She actually phoned him up and asked a lot of questions.
"The younger of the two found it a lot harder. She was in a massive state of denial, but she's gradually got to the point where she has a relationship with him."
She added: "We are on distant but relatively good terms. I don't hate him. But I have to make the best of the situation for our children."
Her husband, who we are not naming to keep Olivia's identity private, was found guilty of viewing Category A sex abuse images - the most severe kind.
He was given a community sentence and put on the sex offenders' register for five years after a Crown Court trial.
Olivia says that having control of who she told about her husband's crimes was a "significant factor" in helping her cope.
She said: "I started off by telling a fairly small number of people, but that meant the majority of people didn't know so it was really difficult and exhausting.
"The neighbours would have seen the police so for a while I felt like a prisoner in my own home.
"I didn't want to see people or feel their stares."
She said she also feared for her own safety and the consequences of vigilantes, adding: "I hadn't done anything wrong but I was still frightened. I got my locks changed. I got a security light put up outside the front of my house and I asked people if I could phone them day or night."
Three years on, she says her family is still having to readjust to the way their lives are now.
Olivia said: "I live in a different part of the country now. I have a new job, a new partner and I'm starting to move on.
"People who I thought were close to me have let me down.
"It changes the whole dynamic of a friendship but sometimes it's good to get rid of the deadwood.
"It's actually people that were just acquaintances before that have been really kind and gone out of their way.
"It's difficult to predict how people will react."